My weekend has been pretty eventful to say the least.
Friday was my mother's birthday. So the family sat gathered 'round the table and ate plenty of icecream cake after singing happy birthday. I felt bad. I didn't get anything for her this year. I probably could have tried. I have some money left on my Target card, and a little on my Wal-mart card. Other than that, I'm broke. I'm not sure how I would have done it either. I don't have a car, or my license. So yeah.

Saturday was ok too. I got to go to a friends house to film a video for broadcasting. It was pretty fun. We walked from her house to Publix (which is just behind the neighbor's backyard) to get some supplies before we shot the video. All we needed were some Tic-Tacs. I enjoyed eating those. Later on in the day, I went to another friend's B-day party. We went paintballing! That was pretty cool too.

Now that it's Sunday, I'm just sitting her relaxing. I have some English homework that I need to complete for tomorrow. I also feel like changing my myspace profile and taking some pics. I shall do that soon.

Well, I'm off to get some lunch. I heard it was fish, corn, spaghetti, and cornbread.


Yum.

...

Hey there!
I'm so glad its Friday!

Finally! Time to relax, and actually get my rest.

Today was pretty good. Except for one thing...

Have you ever felt that you were being used by one of your supposed "best friends"?
Well yeah. That's how I feel right now. One of my friends from school... Idk, it seems that they don't really care about our friendship as much as they care about using me. It seems that in whatever project we do, it's always, "Oh! Come on! Do you have any ideas? What are they! What's your idea! Come on! Come on! We only have 1 more day!" or "Here's what I have for OUR group."

1) If we ARE in a group, I'm just letting you know now that I am NOT the only one that will be coming up with the ideas.

2) If it's my idea, I think I should be able to tell/direct the group in whatever project we will be doing. My idea. My vision for the project. End of story. I don't need one person constantly disagreeing with every word/idea that I give, only to take the same idea and twist it into something completely different. If you really like your ideas, just please take charge and start another group of your own. I know you may want to be with me, but it's not going to work if you keep wanting to mold my ideas into something I wasn't intending. Of course, I'm open to suggestion! But I don't like having my ideas changed and having credit "given" to you for coming up with it. It's just... annoying at times. And it feels like you are truely using me for that purpose alone.

3) OUR group? Not to be mean, but what automatically makes you assume we are in a group together? The last time I checked, I make my own decisions, not someone else. I think I can decided what group I would like to be in. It's not that I don't enjoy spending time with this person. It's just that sometimes friends work better apart, and unfortunately, that's how I feel in this case. I feel we would work a lot better apart. That's just the way I feel.

Ok. I believe that's about it.
This is just how I feel about things at the moment. Not that this person would see it. =/ But I just thought I should post this. This one issue makes me feel like we are growing apart. I honestly don't even feel like "best" friends anymore. More of just, friends... if we could call it that.

*frustration*

Well... it's 7:10 on this fine Wednesday morning, and I have a dilemna.

I can't decide whether to take my new Twilight Messenger Bag to school! =[

Well, you see. I love TWILIGHT. So I can't help but want to show my ever-loving support for them. Plus, I wanted to show one of my friends my Jacob Black and Team Jacob pins. Haha.

But I finally came upon a decision.
Since I don't NEED to use the bad right now, I will wait. But I will put the pins on my backpack! YAY! Haha

Well alrighty.
I'm about to go to school.

I'll BBL.

-JACOB FAN #1.

I have come to a realization.
I daydream way too much.

Because of how much I daydream, I have decided to do some googling and research of my own. One response said something along the lines of how daydreaming makes some feel more comfortable than real life.

And I thought about it. And for me, that's partially true. I don't know. Like... I have been daydreaming alot. Is it because I'm just not satisfied with life right now? I want something more in life. Something better... better than real life. Well... at least for now. I'm not saying I'm not happy with my life! I'm just saying that I want something different! I want to do something where my dreams are actually coming true. I want to make progress!

I'm tired of sitting around the house all the time. I want to get out there. But it seems like all the doors that I have to get out and go have all been shut and locked away. And the keys are burried within some deep dark rock that will probably take years to recover from. I'm just not happy with that type of life. I want to get out there. I have dreams, and I want them to be fullfilled! I want to start living. I'm tired of the same routine. Wake up. Brush teeth. Get dressed. Go to school. Come home. Do homework. Use computer. Eat dinner. Go to bed. It seems like that EVERY SINGLE DAY! And if it's not that, I'm using the computer.

I just want a change! But I feel trapped, with no place to run... and no place to go.

Sometimes I wish daydreams would just come true...
But... just to say they won't would be stupid in my eyes.
My daydreams are attainable, they just seem so far away.

That's why I'm making a "dreambook" to always remind me to keep pressing on.
To remind me of the things that I so eagerly want to come true.

-The Dreamer

Would it be bad to say that... Twilight is my driving force for becoming an actress?

Last night, I was about until after 12 for the TWILIGHT release party at Wal-mart! It was pretty fun! I came with my little home-made "Team Jacob" sign. It was... tacky. lol. But I didn't care. I get to talk to alot of other Twilight fans! And we ended up buying the 2-disc special edition of the movie. When we arrived there at around 10:45, we had to wait until 12:01 before we could finally get it. lol.

But yeah. My sister and I stayed up until about 2:30 watching the movie before we finally decided it was time to go to bed. It wasn't even NEAR the end. But the lack of sleep was beginning to put my body in physical pain. My chest and head started to hurt. =/ I was kind of mad because I wanted to stay up all night watching TWILIGHT. lol. But I knew it would be better for my body to at least try to get some rest. So, we went to bed around 3, and I woke up at around 11 something. >.<>But yeah. My sister and I stayed up until about 2:30 watching the movie before we finally decided it was time to go to bed. It wasn't even NEAR the end. But the lack of sleep was beginning to put my body in physical pain. My chest and head started to hurt. =/ I was kind of mad because I wanted to stay up all night watching TWILIGHT. lol. But I knew it would be better for my body to at least try to get some rest. So, we went to bed around 3, and I woke up at around 11 something. >.< Haha. It was pretty cool.

For the rest of the day, I finished watching the rest of the movie, and concluded with watching the music videos, and all the other special features that were involved with the movie. I must say, the behind the scenes stuff is what truely makes me want to be an actress. To see all the technical stuff and all the fun they had in making such an amazing movie is just... WOW. It makes love what they do. It makes me want to be there and do it too! =] But yeah. That's about it. I hope that one day I can do an amazing movie like TWILIGHT.

3 Cheers for TWILIGHT!
*Hip-Hip... HOORAY!... times 3*

Well, spring break hasn't been as awesome as I hoped. I've mostly been at home, playing SIMS2, eating, and writing stories. Oh! And listening to music as well.

I was just on GAIA, you know checking my mail, making sure I haven't missed anything. I realized that there was a new announcement. So, I clicked it. It appears that Gaia is advertising the release of TWILIGHT on DVD! Agh! I'm so excited! I can't wait. I was talking with my mom the other day. She was telling me about how my sister wanted to get it. I told her about the midnight release party, and surprisingly, she said if we could stay up, she would let us go. =]

So yeah. Anyways, I was on Gaia, and I was looking at all the comments and criticism that Twilight was getting.

Personally, I used to think TWILIGHT was stupid, and now that I think back upon it, I realize why. Since TWILIGHT is the new "thing", it was cool to hate it. So, I did. I hated TWILIGHT. That is... until I saw the movie and actually read the series. I will admit, the acting could have been better, but the TWILIGHT SAGA is amazing!

Of course, as a severely super EXTREME fan of Twilight, all of the negative comments kind of hit a nerve. I hadn't realized how many people on Gaia hated Twilight. Of course, there were some that absolutely loved it, but then the majority of the people were dogging the movie and saying the series is horrible, and things along the lines of, "Oh! Stephenie Meyer could have broken her fingers instead of writing that horrible book!" And oh... it just made me SO MAD! I love Stephenie Meyer! She has a beautiful style of writing, and who cares if the VAMPIRES SPARKLE! This is not another "normal" vampire novel. (In case you haven't noticed). It's a freakin' story! Everyone has a different point of view. If this is what she thought, it super speedy werewolves, and lovely sparkling vampires was her dream, then AWESOME! I think it was an amazing idea.

I couldn't think of a story so beautiful and complex myself.

I don't care what you dumb old TWILIGHT haters may think, but I think that it is amazing.
And I love TWILIGHT.

Oh... and just for the record.

After cleaning the kitchen and doing some laundry, I decided to come back to the computer.
Well, I was surfing around and I came across this! I thought it was so totally awesome! lol.

Let me know what you think.




Pretty cool, huh? ;]

Well, it the day after the day of the middle of the month. Well kinda. March has 31 days, doesn't it? Well... maybe not technically the day after. Idk. Maybe more towards, between the 15th and 16th of the month.

This morning, I did my devotions, and then went on to reading NEW MOON once more. I read that in bed for about an hour and a half. Then my mom made me some french fries for breakfast. I haven't them in forever. 0_o

Anyways, I felt the urge to blog on this fine Monday morning. It is officially the second day of my Spring Break. I am very happy. I have recently been thinking about alot of stuff... as usual. Ever since the beginning of January, I have been writing a fac fiction for one of my best friends involving her and Emmett Cullen from TWILIGHT. It's actually pretty awesome. She was writing me a fanfiction relating to Robert Pattinson as well. Sadly, we both kind of grew away from our interestes in the two. But in my effort for reading the TWILIGHT saga over again, and have decided to continue writing her story.

I love writing. It is like a movie playing inside my head, that I just can't wait to let free. I think I will go and finish the 16th chapter I started last night. Hopefully, it will be complete soon. If not, my french fries shall keep me company.

Sincerely,

TWILIGHTlover.

Things are changing once again. I'm trying to adjust myself to it, slowly that is. Its amazing how I always hit this moment every year. It happens every now and then. Something changes for the worst. Nothing ever really is good when you want it to be. Well... when you want it most.

Am I selfish because I want something to work out perfectly for me, just this... once?

I don't want the same change that I encountered last year. I want something fresh. Something amazing. Something understanding. And something PERFECT.

Something special... just for you.

I thought this animation was cute. It's been on my computer for a while now. lol

Thought I'd show you. =]

This week has been hectic. All this week my school was taking graduation exams. It was fun at times, but just annoying at others. Because of the testing, and different peoples classes, the schedule was rearranged for this week. This was in order for everyone to be able to go to one of their classes at least once of twice. It was fun. I already took and passed all of them my Freshman year. Because of this, I got to stay in... the GYM. *dramatic music*

Amazingly, that was ok at times. Others, it was just boring. Especially, when we had to stand in there for almost three hours. But it wasn't all BAD. I got to meet lots of new people. The drama group is probably the most awesome at my school. haha XD It was... interesting. X]

I feel bad. I haven't practiced playing my lovely Edward-Jacob in a while! =[ For those who don't know, Edward-Jacob is my lovely guitar. And yes, he is named after little EJ (AKA The son that Bella Swan never had, who also was named after Edward and Jacob). Hehe. Yes, I know. Please don't give me any problems on the name. TWILIGHT is amazing. Deal. <3

Well, I know I have more to say, but I will probably post some more later today.
I'll save it for then. ;]

Stay positive.

Well, it's Saturday.

Today was a rather interesting day. Apart from being bored, I ate lots of grapes, 2 tacos, and went to the casting call for the job at Applebee's. It went pretty well. The manager said that call backs for an interview would possibly occue Monday. So I hope I get a callback. I'd LOVE to work there!

Here is my list of the 5 top things I will be saving up for:

1. a new ZUNE
2. a video camera
3. Tickets to Massachusettes, New York, and Chicago. (plus spending money!) X]
4. a laptop.
5. shopping spree (this is after I pay my mom back.)

Well that's about it.
Hopefully I'll think of something more later. =]

Rawr.
xoxo.

Thank God it's the weekend!

I have been waiting for this day for a very long time! School has been getting so tiresome and annoying. To many deadlines, to many things to do. Agh! Now that I think about it. I still have to pick out a monologue to memorize. CRAP.

I really hope that I get accepted into advanced production drama.

But first, I have to find a monologue. lol. Gah... this sucks.

Hm. Well, I am going to go to the cast calling tomorrow. Hopefully I get a call back for an interview! ^^

I can't really think of anything else... Well, I have been thinking about something, but I may talk about it later. X] Haha.

Ta-ta- For now!

It is blogging that makes me look forward to the end of my days. It hasn't occured to me how much I've come accustomed to blogging. Writing frees the mind. It helps to relieve my stress. It's almost like a treat.

So much has been going on for the past few days. I've been trying to focus and keep track of everything, but sometimes, it just seems so overwhelming. Is the Junior year of highschool supposed to be the most busy of them all? I still have yet to take the ACT AND the SAT. I need to turn in my form for National Honor Society.

I just hope everything goes by smoothly. Currently, I have been going back and forth from this blog entry to other tabs on Firefox for about the past... oh... 2 hours or so. lol. So I have decided to come back and finish it before I have to go to bed.

I found a few monologues that I would like to do for my audition on Monday for Advanced Production Broadcasting. I'm so excited. I hope I get excepted.

Wow. It's late.
I should probably get going lol.

Hasta la vista ... BABEH! <3

After a sleepless night, and a stressful day, I am satisfied and quite content to be at home once more. Being challenged with all of the problems and crap that are pushed on to my plate during the day at school are quite frustrating. I enjoy the time that I have to come home and relax after a long, hard day.

This morning was cold. Yesterday was colder. I'm still waiting for summer to hurry up and come around already! School is getting better and better as summer gets even closer. It's kind of sad. Right when you are actually starting to get good grades and actually UNDERSTAND the class, it's time to leave and have fun. Well... leaving school to have fun it's that bad.

I can't stay long. Afterall, my second draft of my 8 page book report is due tomorrow. =/ I've been writing different notes to myself throughout the day to help make the process go smoother for me this afternoon. Writing papers on papers or pieces of work is just stupid. And it's definately not one of my most favorite things to do.

But, I've come to understand that this all comes in the package along with GROWING UP and MATURING. This sucks.

OH! Also, I have possibly been considering getting a job at Applebee's. I really need the money. I hope I get it.

Well, I'm off to write that paper.
Hopefully, I'll be back soon!

Chow, Senores.

... 0_O